Stop Being a Nice Guy – Be A Kind Gentleman

Many men have been taught that being nice is the key to attracting women, but you need to stop being a nice guy. Research shows that being kind – which is different from being nice – is a far better way to attract women and dates. In this blog post, we’ll explore the difference between being nice and being kind, and why kindness is a better way to go. In the video below, Jerod talks about the difference between niceness and kindness, and how “being nice” is generally a manipulation tactic in order to get something.

"Nice guys are putting on an act so if you're a nice guy what people say when they say that you're a nice guy they're saying you are fake. You are acting in a way that is not congruent to who you actually are."

Being nice is an act

Most people act nice in order to get something in return. However, it’s just an act and it’s not beneficial to do since it’s not congruent with who you actually are. 

Kindness is genuine and comes from the heart, while niceness is often fake and often has ulterior motives. If you’re being nice to someone in order to get something from them, then they will probably be able to tell. It’s better to just be yourself and let people see the real you, rather than pretending to be someone you’re not. 

Being genuine and authentic is more important than being nice. It will also make you happier because you will be doing things that come from your heart.

Be Kind Instead

The difference between being a kind gentleman and being a “nice guy” is that the kind gentleman does things to be kind and does not expect anything in return. He will hold the door open, helps somone with their groceries, and gives up his seat on the bus. He does these things because he is kind-hearted and wants to make others happy. The “nice guy” does these things in the hopes of getting something in return, such as a date or a friendship. So if you want to be a true gentleman, be kind and do things without expecting anything in return.


Stop being a nice guy and start being kind. Kindness doesn’t have ulterior motives; it simply comes from a good place. When you act kindly, others will respond kindly, creating a ripple effect of positivity.

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